How to Build Resilience in a Child: Guide for Parents & Schools
Sure, some people are naturally more prone to it than others, but resilience is actually a skill. As such, it can be learned, practised, and mastered.
Here’s how to build resilience in a child as a parent or teacher. After all, like with any other skill or ability, the earlier one starts… the better!
Resilience in children isn’t ‘just a buzzword!’
Resilience is the ability to successfully adapt to challenging experiences, being able to cope with a crisis both mentally and emotionally.
Why is resilience important in a child?
A resilient mindset allows children to be better prepared and equipped for the challenges of adult life and those they’re already facing.
Strained friendships, failed exams, lost sports games… learning how to build resilience in a child will lead to them recovering from setbacks in a healthier way.
It’ll also make a positive impact on their mental health, reducing anxiety and stress.
What are the 7 C's of resilience?
The 7 C’s of resilience are:
Competence
Confidence
Connection
Character
Contribution
Coping
Control
As an adult, learning how to build resilience in a child basically means helping them develop all seven aspects.
7 tips on how to build resilience in a child as a parent or teacher
Let’s tackle one C at a time!
Encourage children to solve problems on their own (competence)
Of course, they should know they can count on you!
However, when challenges arise, pushing them to give it a go first is what builds resilience in youth.
This ranges from daily tasks like homework to asking them what they think could be a solution to some unforeseen circumstances.
2. Reward their accomplishments (confidence)
For children to trust their abilities, they must first feel that they have good reason to do so.
So, praise them when they solve problems and show them why it’s important that they appreciate their own accomplishments, too.
And, when they’re doubting their skills, remind them of that specific time they succeeded with a similar challenge.
3. Prioritise meaningful bonds (connection)
A loving family, reliable friends and tight communities: having healthy relationships to count on helps children develop a strong sense of belonging and security.
They’ll also be less likely to look for problematic cliques and destructive behaviours.
4. Help them develop their own personality and sense of self-worth (character)
Whether it stemmed from a film scene or an episode at school, have you noticed your children disagreeing or having a strong opinion on something?
Have a conversation! Get them to talk about what they think is right or wrong to help them connect with their true values.
For example, ask them what they would have done differently had they been in their friend’s shoes.
5. Show them they can make an impact (contribution)
Group projects, sports, helping their grandparents with their food shopping… Another important way to build resilience in a child is to help them feel they can make a difference in the world around them.
So, when they bring a meaningful contribution, thank them: you’ll increase their willingness to be proactive!
6. Help them be flexible and prepared (coping)
Has something gone wrong? Encourage them to give it another go instead of giving up.
Leading by example is vital, too. You can’t expect a child to react positively to unexpected changes if you often panic whenever some unforeseen circumstances occur!
To overcome life’s challenges successfully, children must also develop a varied range of skills. From problem-solving to reducing stress through mindfulness, this can be achieved through workshops with their friends.
7. Encourage them to be more independent (control)
Another tip on how to build resilience in a child is to make them see they do have control over their actions and decisions.
For example, encourage them to set themselves realistic goals, and highlight how they achieved something thanks to their decision.
Mastering Mindfulness and Building Resilience: our workshop for children in London and Buckinghamshire
As well as learning how to build resilience in a child, you can fast-track this process for them as a parent or teacher through Brightstarz.
Our interactive workshop focuses on using mindfulness to be more engaged, proactive, and resilient in a challenging world.
Discover our workshop on mindfulness & building resilience in children
